Which is the longest word in the dictionary?

“Smiles,” because there are miles between each “s.”

What did one toilet say to the other toilet?

You look flushed.

Why was the broom late?

It over-swept.

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a little boogie in it.

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

Because he never lands.

What did the policeman say to his belly button?

You’re under a vest.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one.

What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

The same middle name.